I have a 2 yr old who has been hitting for months now. It is normally me that he hits but it has extended to my husband, and other people.
We deal with it exactly the same way every time- getting down on his level, saying no hitting, putting him in time out and walking away. he eventually calms down and says sorry after a massive tantrum. he has excellent language skills, so its not a communication issue. It just won't stop. It is constant and a violent reaction to every thing he doesn't like. I am at my wits end!!
It does sound as if you are doing what you need to at this stage and although it probably doesn't feel like you're making much progress, you probably are. You're not inadvertently rewarding him with lots of lovely attention and you're giving him the same clear message that hitting is not ok. This probably is just an age and stage he's going through, fuelled by frustration and a toddler need to control the world and everything in it. For him, he can't understand that things won't always go his way and for now, his strategy of dealing with big feelings is to have these emotional meltdowns. As he matures and learns there are other, more socially acceptable ways of dealing with anger and frustration but he's probably just in a transition phase for now.
Your job is to be consistent and work collaboratively with your partner and to "catch" your boy when he's playing well and happily. Then heap lots of praise on him and tell him what you like about what he's doing. Be patient, with time this phase will pass as he learns what it means to be more socially adept.
23 Jun 2013