Huggies Forum

Gaps between babies Rss

DH and I have been discussing this a lot lately, before DD was born we wanted our kids 12-18 months apart as they would be great mates, once DD was born I struggled seriously and decided there was no way I could cope with another one so soon. Now I am feeling a lot more together and really enjoying my wee girl and starting to wonder what is the best thing to do.

One part of me thinks having them close together is better for the kids and easier in a few years once they are all past the night waking, nap changing stage, but then I think maybe it's best to leave it and enjoy DD growing up and have another one when she is old enough to go to preschool etc...

What are your opinions on this?
Ours are 2 years apart, give or take a bit smile
DD is 2yrs 1 week older than DS and DS is 22 months older than DD2.

For us this gap works pretty well. Like you said, they grow up nice and close, all the 'bad' stuff gets out the way sooner - nappies, waking up at night, etc.

There are positives and negatives for both a short gap and a bigger gap... guess it's just what you think will work the best for your family.. smile


our children will be three years apart (pregnant at the moment)
i think three years is good. however, i am expecting a bit of jeolusly, and i think that it is normal at any age, unless the age gap is so short that the first one is still a tiny baby.
our daughter will be off to 3 year old kindy (one day a week) when bubs is born, and this gives us the one on one time with bubs. but also planning on doing one on one things with my three year old when bubs is sleeping. thats the plan anyway LOL
We've been thinking about exactly the same thing and have decided to leave it another year before trying again, it took us awhile the first time so probably won't leave it longer than that, although we are using protection at the moment we would be quite happy with a 'accident'
Apparently the ideal time for your body, is 18 months +... so that's not considering any of the other stuff associated with having two kids, just from a phsyiological stand point. I tend to think DH and I will think about it when DD is about 15 months as I would like another winter baby.




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My children are all very close- 12 months 11 days between DS#1 & DS#2, 22 months between DS#2 & DD and 15 months between DD & DS#3. There will be 2 years 5 months between DS#3 and #5 (thats a bit of a big gap for me but nature had its own ideas!).

I love them all so close together, we are so lucky they get along really well.

The age gap between me and my brothers is 7 and 8 years and the ages gap between my husband and his sister and brother is 10 and 12 years. We really didn't want big age gaps, so literally went the other way!

Good luck with the decision making...

Helenxx
My children are all very close- 12 months 11 days between DS#1 & DS#2, 22 months between DS#2 & DD and 15 months between DD & DS#3. There will be 2 years 5 months between DS#3 and #5 (thats a bit of a big gap for me but nature had its own ideas!).

I love them all so close together, we are so lucky they get along really well.

The age gap between me and my brothers is 7 and 8 years and the ages gap between my husband and his sister and brother is 10 and 12 years. We really didn't want big age gaps, so literally went the other way!

Good luck with the decision making...

Helenxx
I'm pregnant at the moment. My DS will be 19ish months when number 2 arrives.

This was exactly what I wanted. My brother and I have this age gap and are the best of friends smile
we have small age gaps and although it was very hectic when they were babies it was good training for the present time.Things just get busier.Sometimes I think it might have been better with a larger gap but we did not have youth on our side.All in all,I do like the age gap.Downside is that there is a lot of bickering(but that would probably happen regardless of the ages).Upside is........still thinking of the upside lol....
Upside all toilet trained and out of prams etc when you start the school experience.
Its great now that they can all shower themselves and make toast or something if they are hungry.
Best of luck with it all.

mum of 3 boys aged 11, 13 and 14


DH and I have been discussing this a lot lately, before DD was born we wanted our kids 12-18 months apart as they would be great mates, once DD was born I struggled seriously and decided there was no way I could cope with another one so soon. Now I am feeling a lot more together and really enjoying my wee girl and starting to wonder what is the best thing to do.

One part of me thinks having them close together is better for the kids and easier in a few years once they are all past the night waking, nap changing stage, but then I think maybe it's best to leave it and enjoy DD growing up and have another one when she is old enough to go to preschool etc...

What are your opinions on this?


I think you just need to weigh up both the positives and the negatives of whichever outcomes you may be considering, and then decide which things you ultimately would choose to take on.

I planned very close age gaps; it has been wonderful. My kids are 3, 2 and 1. They learn a lot from interacting with each other, each has virtues which really help another. For instance, my daughter is really overserious and sometimes overreactive (and definitely likes to run the show), however my son is much gentler and is extremely sweet and practical. He is not her intellectual equal, and he has different methods of going about things. She changes her behaviour in order to accomodate him, she also benefits from his rougher and more silly play, and she has taught him to be assertive as well as involving him in more quiet and intellectual type play. Both of the older kids completely modify games, conversations and reactions to accomodate for my 1 year old son. He in turn is confident in doing his own thing and making his own fun, and will not hesitate to try new things as he sees his siblings do, nor is he hesitant to speak and to help around the house. He sees language as the means of communication and is mature and aware for his age. I see these things as invaluable lessons and opportunities for them that they may otherwise not have been given. Those kinds of opportunities are not necessarily able to be replicated by a parent.

But on the other hand, it would be an amazing thing for any child to be able to spend a lot of one-on-one time with a loving parent. So your thoughts of having a bigger age gap would allow for that. Some of the things available to only children, or to those with larger age gaps, may become more difficult with close age gaps.

If you feel you may not cope, then think of some issues that would arise with either situation, and try to evaluate how you might react or handle those.

It is entirely personal. I hope you can make a choice you feel comfortable with smile
We got 2 and a half year gap between the boys, it chaos at the moment but i'm getting use to it.
We planning at least a 2 year gap between little man and the next one.

It what you know you can handle. We always said 2 year gap between them and that what we done. I had to have c-section both times and the doctor said it takes a year to totally recover from it and even though i feel great i know my body still recovering.

By the time we have our 3rd little master will be in kindy and that good for me because he be older and be more wanting to do things for himself.




We will have a 3yr age gap with this baby and DS. I feel really comfortable with this, I got plenty of one on one time with him and he is getting much more independent so I will get one on one time with this one. He also goes to daycare 2 days so that will be good for time with bub. I think it will be good that DS will start school when no.2 is hitting 2yo. Plus he is well and truly out of the pram and -might- be TT by then (if not, it wont be too long after) He has been a very full on toddler and I can't imagine how I would've coped having no.2 a year ago, but like others have said you just learn to handle it. I don't think there is a right or wrong answer smile

DS - Nov 2008 & DD - Feb 2012

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