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HELP almost 4 year old having poo accidents and also NOT listening Rss

Hi All

I am in desprete need of some help and advice. My son has been toilet trained since he was almost 3 and hes now almost 4. About 3 months ago he started having accidents mabye once every 2 weeks. Now hes having them almost every day. But what i dont understand is he does his wees in the toilet. I take him to the toile numerious times a day and then all of a sudden hes pooed him self and i ask him and he just says its an accident. Nothing has changed at home oin the last month except our daughters first birthday and her starting to walk which she got alot of attention. We give him lots of attention and affection so im not sure as to why this is happening. He knows to go to the toilet but he just doesnt?? Also he has been such a great child with doing what hes told and listening. But the last few months he will NOT listen to my self of his father when we tell him to do or not to do things we have been getting bad reports back from his kindy saying hes doing the same thing their so its not just at home.. I just dont know what to do i have tried so many things and im just starting to get so frustrated.....

Any advice and help would be greatly appreciated. Thanks Everyone smile
Regards Tamara
Has something happened at Kinder that may be affecting him? Has his behaviour always been bad at kinder? if not I would be speaking to his teacher and asking her if she can think of anything that may have happened that is causing him to act this way.
My friend has just been through the EXACT same thing with her 4y/o daughter. After many doctors visits and trying everything she took her to a peadiatrician who found that she had a bowel over flow.
She must of at some stage been so badly constipated that it caused her bowel to be so full that it would overflow causing her to have 'accidents'. She had to give her laxitives to flush out the excess.
It has got to the point that the nerve in her bottom that tells you that you need to poo isn't reacting, so my friend has to sit her on the toilet from time to time and make her try to do a poo (the child would say she doesn't need to, but sure enough after trying for a few minutes it comes).
It was a bit of a process to get her through it, but they got there.

It may be an idea to take him to see a peadiatricain to see if it's the same thing?

As for the naughtiness, i'm not sure. This child has been the same, we just though she was being a 'lil miss' but maybe it is connected? smile

Good luck i hope you get some answers.
I agree with Shann86, my girl had a bad constipation issue and on researching it, that information came up. It is very very common in kinder kids and young primary schoolers. My girl didn't have the overflow issue, but the doctor explained that she probably would have had it soon if we had not caught it when we did.
My DD had this problem when she was 4. It took ages to get it sorted, including ultrasounds of her bladder. It was over flow and then she was so constipated that she couldn't feel when her bladder was full so would also wet herself. She lost the sensation of needing to go to the toilet and it took a long long time to return. With her it's gluten intolerance, causing her not to digest her food properly. As for the poor behaviour, constipation can make you very cranky and uncomfortable and have low tolerance to everything due to the discomfort. I'd be getting to the doctor asap.
Thank you all so much for your advice and help it means so much. I have an appointment with our dr tomorrow afternoon at least now i have something to go by and ask if its bowl overflow. Greatly Appreciated smile
no advice sorry, but mil has told me that dh used to often poo his pants because he was too 'busy' playing and left it until too late to go to the toilet.Luckily he grew out of it LOL laugh

mum of 3 boys aged 11, 13 and 14

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