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Huggies Forum

Wedding vs Elope Rss

Hi All,

My partner and I are planning to elope this year, we both don't really want to spend money on a wedding and just want to be married.

I was wondering if others had a wedding, did you think about eloping?

If there are others that eloped, did you tell anyone beforehand?
Did anyone react badly to the news?
How did you do it? As in where and how did you tell people or did you still have a party for everyone to attend?
Did you regret not having the wedding?

Just looking to get as much information as I can before I make this big decision smile

Thanks X
I didn't elope but I did have a surprise wedding, my husband and I invited everyone to a party for my hubby's birthday. We live in a different town from all of our family so it was easy for us to organise without anyone finding out. We did not have bridesmaids etc and only 3 of our guests were not family members with only about 30 people in total. We only had immediate family members. I did wear a wedding dress and my hubby wore a suit but everyone else was just casual. We got married at a local look out and then went home for a bbq and drinks. It was the best day!
We did a surprise wedding too. We got married in the morning at the Brisbane registry office and then had a lunch for family and friends afterwards. We told people the lunch was a graduation celebration as my dh had just finished his masters degree. It was a good compromise because we knew people would get their noses out of joint if we just ran off and did it, but we didn't want a big fan fare or anyone buying presents.

Double posting issues at the moment - sorry.

I am the same as you! I dont want a big wedding only because of the costs behind it.

But I wanted to celebrate the date. I've just decided to take parents and siblings out to dinner. Your still looking about $1000 but at least you get to celebrate it with the important ones!

Thanks for your replies ladies smile

Yeah it's the cost mainly but I also get quite anxious having different groups of friends and family in the same place as I worry about people getting along and having a good time etc.

Also after the Christmas holidays I have realised my mum has always been quite pessimistic and I'm worried this would effect my big day. But I know she will be quite upset if she wasn't invited so I was thinking of eloping and then doing something with family but yes it can still be quite expensive even just doing a nice dinner or something along those lines.

And I keep thinking it's about me and my partner and noone else. smile
Hi there,

We had the same issues with family being in the same place (my parents are divorced and make joint things painful) and as far as money goes, this was a second marriage for both of us and my first wedding cost well over $45,000, was a constant source of stress and I swore I would never do it again hahaha.

We "eloped" to Bali, howver we did tell everyone before hand, we told them we were happy for them to come along and the dates (food is increadibly reasonable over there, so we had no issue paying for dinner for anyone who made the trip - least we could do smile ), however we only told them 3 months before and none of them could make it.

We were married in a villa with just DH my stepson and myself, our witnesses were the wedding planners and it was the most beautiful intimate ceremony that included my stepson and had everyone in tears (happy ones!!).

After the ceremony we had photos on the beach and then we went to Metis for a wonderful dinner, and because we had saved so much on the wedding we drank fabulous champagne and had every dessert on the menu. Other diners also sent glasses of champagne over to the table to congratulate us - it was lovely.

The wedding itself was so cheap, flowers and villa decorations, photographer, minister, civil official etc and planning was just over $2000 from memory, no costs for reception decorations etc and dinner was around $1000 (but we REALLY splashed on the champers etc). With all the money we saved we were able to spend almost a month there at fab hotels for US, not all the hangers on.

It is up to you but I would not change a thing - the day was perfect and personal, just for us.

As far as family goes, even though they were not there we gave them the option so they were not too upset and for Xmas that year I gave them all hardcover photo books with all the beautiful photos from the wedding and they all loved it.

One day if they all get along and if we have the resources we may renew our vows and invite them all, that option is always there if you feel like you missed out.

But remember, one of the biggest sources of conflict in marriage is money issues - the last thing you want to do is start married life in debt up to your eyeballs thanks to a big wedding!

Good Luck smile

I want to do the same thing. I don't want the big white wedding and all the hassle that comes with it.

I love Jemron's idea of going somewhere like Bali, Fiji or even one of the islands in Australia and telling family that they can attend if they wish. That's what I'm going to do.

That sounds really beautiful Jemron and it's a recurring thing I keep hearing about how happy people are with the decision to 'elope'.

we got married but thinking back on it i would have rather eloped. i mean i love looking at all my wedding pictures with DH and me in a big white dress. i went through so much stress trying to organise the whole wedding and it was so much money that i would have rather spent on something else.
if i could do it again i would elope, not sure where though. i would then have a cocktail type party and announce it there that we eloped and that this was like a party in celebration of that. it wouldnt be a fancy party either, just nibbles and drinks.
to get pictures i would just hire a dress or something and get a photographer take pictures of hubby and me at a beach or gardens or something like that.

and yes i have given this some thought before seeing this thread . smile

Haha love the plan benjamins mummy smile
My brother also refused the ceremony. However, he had a special situation. He was alone for a long time until his brother reminded him that you can check here. He went to a dating site and kept a close eye on his future bride. It was a really good decision. They had a modest wedding but they wanted to leave more money to raise their first child))
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