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How to help toddler accept newborn? Lock Rss

So, our 10 day old seems to have really thrown our 19-month old into a bit of spin!

He's literally turned into a little devil, overnight! He's started throwing things, screaming and yelling and, when I'm feeding, I just get given this evil look as if to say "not that thing again"! Yesterday he came over to pat the babies head and, 15 seconds later, he nearly took his head off with a slap! We tried to give him the baby to hold, for a photo, and he literally just looked away and ignored him.

I know he's only little and doesn't fully understand but, there must be something I can do to help him? I still try to give him as much time as I can, in terms of bathing, putting him to bed and playing with him as much as I can but, because I had a C-section, I can't play with him properly or pick him up which he wants, a lot. It absolutely breaks my heart that he thinks we have this "thing" and don't care for him anymore - the way he looks at me now is even different.

So, to those out there with two, what did you do to help settle your toddler? Any hints or tips would be truly appreciated.

Thanks, again!
I did the 'feeding time toys' with mine and also would make up a lunch box type thing of snacks etc that I could pull out when I was feeding bub because it was almost guaranteed that as soon as I sat down to feed bub the older sibling would decide they were starving and HAD to have something to eat right away. Having the food pre-prepared helped because I could give them something without really interrupting bub's feed. I also made sure I always had a bottle of water filled for them for the same reason smile

If you don't mind some tv viewing you could also have him sit on the couch next to you and put on his favourite tv show while you're feeding. I found once I was confident with feeding (so maybe not something you can do right now, but something for in the future) I could sit on the couch feeding bub with one arm around the older sibling for a 'cuddle' while we watched their favourite tv show. After a few min they'd normally climb down but we'd had a cuddle and they'd done something special with me, even though bub was feeding. You can do the same sort of thing with some books, just make sure you're able to turn the page one handed/get your older child to 'help' turn the page.

I haven't had a c-section but did have my gallbladder out when DD1 was about 15 months old. When I couldn't pick her up for cuddles etc post op I started to encourage her to climb onto the couch next to me then I'd put a couch cushion (those 'decorative' ones) on my tummy to protect it a bit and she'd climb into my lap and we'd have the cuddles that way.

Where realistic, even getting them to help out with things for bub can be good. Admittedly mine were older when I had another child but I would ask them to hand me the nappy/hold the new nappy when it was change time etc.

I'm currently relating to your dramas Pinal.
My 4 and half yr old girl has turned into a little devil too. It's awful and upsetting.
I'm hoping that 11 months on, you might have some advice for what worked and didn't and what things are like now that your bub is older.

Your ideas are great liesha. I've created a rewards chart and tried to be consistent with the rules... but her behaviour is still quite aggressive and she is laughing at us when we discipline her (time out, no trampoline etc).

Does any one else have some more suggestions? Thanks in advance.
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