Can you enjoy your next pregnancy

Hi Everyone
My husband and I have a beautiful five year old daughter (six in two months going on twenty, as they do !!) that I had at a young age. About 13 months ago I finally felt ready to add to our family. Since then we have had three miscarriage two early 6, 7 weeks and the last one at 12 weeks which resulted in a D&C performed eight weeks ago.
Yesterday I got a postive preganancy test (faint) and I felt nothing, non of the excitment that I would normally feel that would result in me doing two pregnancy tests a day and lining them up on our kitchen bench like a crazy lady.
My question is does is get better?? I am a positive thinker and try hard to remain positive but I just want to get pregnant and enjoy it like everyone else.
I'm having a sad day today and just needed to get that out, any tips would be appreciated smile]
Cheers MEl

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Hi
So sorry to hear of you losses and Congrats on your positive test.I Lost DS 2 at 38 weeks he was stillborn. I will never forget 5 months later falling pregnant.My stomach sort of sunk and I just felt sick. It was almost like I was to scared to be excited.
As time wore on,although the fear was very real throughout the entire time, I dared to be excited and think about my impending arrival in a positive way.
When we experience loss we lose that innocence for life, but we also learn how blessed we are to be able to have our children and we dont take anything for granted. We now have another beautiful boy who we consider to be a gift from our angel.
Good luck with this pregnancy and feel free to vent when you need to

Hi there Melann,

Sorry to hear about your m/c's. The little bubs you can't have with you will be watching over you and your family. A friend explained to me just last night, that she now can keep her bubs closer to her forever, because they are now in her heart. She will never have to let them any further away from her. I guess the normal process of giving birth, and then having the bubs grow up. Her little bubs are held very close to her heart.

Congrats on your BFP. I agree with the others, once you are past your dates, I believe the anxiety will decrease (i'm not quite there yet, so I'll find out for myself soon). I think there is a big loss of innocence once you have lost a bub. I don't think we can go back to what it was like before, we end up with a different type of reserved excitement.

I tried my hardest at the begining to just put it all in the back of my mind. Yeah, I'm pregnant, but I'll deal with it later. Once I was past the 12 week mark, I just said, well, if something goes wrong it goes wrong, I can only do so much to keep bubs safe, and I'll do that. Once I got to 20 weeks, I kept telling myself, well I'm over half way, so far so good.
At 24/25 weeks I said to myself, well if something goes wrong, I just have to trust the drs will do everything they can.
Once I got to 30/31 weeks I was like, right, now if something happens like if I go into prem labour or something, then the dr's will have a good fight on their hands, but there is a good chance they can help bubs.
Now I'm 36 weeks, and I have 20 days to go...I'm just holding my breath, counting down one day at a time. I don't know how I will be bringing DD2 home from the hospital. We had DD1 with us at home, with what we thought was a clean bill of health. So my date.. is 15 days old... I think I'll be a total mess by then.

I guess its like being forced to ride a rollercoaster that no one wants to be on. The emotions can be very extreem and very out of control. Set up a network of people around you, your DH, your extended families,friends, on line friends, and have people around you that are willing to ride the rollercoater with you, share your emotions and if you have a crap day and need to be a cranky pants, then do it. Keeping everything inside, will mean it has to explode eventually, but if you have little vents when you need, there will be less damage!

Hi Mel

So sorry to hear of your recent losses. Like Spunkymummy, I lost my DD1 a stillbirth in '05 and am now just over 34 weeks pregnant again.

I wish I could say things do get easier but pregnancy alone is a windmill of emotions and anxieties. Just remember to look after yourself.. you can never spoil yourself too much! Make sure you do plenty of the things that you enjoy and surround yourself with the people that make you happy. As the others have said, venting and talking helps alot too.
I actually keep a diary. I write all my thoughts and feelings in it before I go sleep sometimes.. I've found that just getting things out of my head helps.

Remember to have some undisturbed 'you' time too.. wether it be 10 minutes or an hour a day of you doing something soley for yourself thats within your own space where you can just.. relax with a book, or a hot drink, or a hot bath..and enjoy the moment. You deserve it!

Congrats on your pregnancy Mel smile. I do hope things go well for you.

Regards

Bo

Thanks Guys
IT definately helps to share with people who understand.

I am going to try to do a bit of writing to see if that helps The brain plays funny games with you as well as hormones.

This forum was a fantasic idea and great support network.

Thank you for sharing your experiences with me smile]

Cheers Mel

Hi Mel,
Sorry to her about your loss. I mc between my first and second children. I was preg within the month I mc.(not planned and I would say not a good idea)I did not do alot of what people on the forum has suggested and should have. I needed to deal with my feelings about the mc and didn't and prop still haven't. Try and keep positive and maybe find a friend you can talk to in the deep ways we sometimes need to but someone that will not bring you down. I find chocolate works well too!!!!!!!!
Paula

Hi Melann,I to had two MC whlist trying for no:3 and it's heartbreaking.I found it very hard to get excited about the pregnancy.My MCS happened very early 6 weeks, so by the time i had made it to 10 weeks i did start to relax and enjoy that time albeit with sickness and fatigue.Keep being positive and try to focus on your health and your beautiful family. Thinking of you and best wishes Marnie

Hi i know how you feel. I lost 1 at 4 weeks due to an etopic pregnancy and 12 weeks pregnant just at christmas. I have just found out i am pregnant again. I didnt know how to feel i cried. I am happy to be pregnant but i am also scared as cant loose another. I think it will get easier for you just take it easy and keep thinking positive i know thats hard when you feel the way you do. I have just moved to Aussie and dont know people here so its hard that i have noone s help during my pregnancy.

good luck and hope things get better for you.