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Dear Monica, I’m so sorry for your losses. I know how hard it is to loose children. It's sad that you receive no support from your family in such difficult moment of your life. It’s terrible, that your relatives behave in such a way. This is not your fault! Stop blaming yourself! You just make everything worse with such thoughts. It’s good you found strength and you don't give up. You made a right thing you came here! Who can support you better then women, who know how it feels, when you can’t give birth. I also had some fears. I was worrying, that my husband will leave me for another woman, who will be able to carry children. Probably someone would say “Leave him! Why do you need a husband like him?” But I love my dh. And I’m sure you love yours. It's so nice he supports you! I should tell you that after we had surrogacy, my relatives changed their attitude completely! My dh had also changed. He shows me his love all the time! He loves our son and he is so grateful! Even considering the fact, that there was a surrogate mother who carried and gave birth to our child. So I truly believe and hope that everything will change in your family and they will change their behavior! Unfortunately, surrogacy is very expensive in our country. We couldn't afford it. That's why we began to look for clinics in other countries. We wanted to find best doctors and, at the same time, affordable price. It's better not to contact agencies. There are many fraudsters among them. So it'd better to adress clinics directly. I advice you to pay attention to all reviews, positive and negative. Browse clinics official websites. There you can find services, prices, reviews, photos, etc. Also there you can find direct contacts. Don't be afraid to call/send mail with questions, which interest you. I hope this will help you! I wish you good luck and if you have questions or anything else, I'm always ready to help!
so sorry for your losses, how awful of your family!! to say those things to you that it is un-natural etc. We don't have control over our bodies and what goes on, on the inside.. You poor thing, they wouldn't be helping you at all saying things like that to you. I do wish you all the best on your journey xx
Monicagr1704 wrote:
Thank you so much for your supportive words. Your story helped me to calm down a little. You inspired me to continue a fight for my happiness. I’m so tired of all this! I love my husband and I want to build a family with him! I hope my family' opinion will be changed as well. I’m looking for clinic and I’ve already contacted some UK and USA clinics. Prices are huge! Actually I don’t think we can afford it. I asked my father to borrow some money. When he heard how I want to spend them, he refused. He told me not to be dumb and whether try to conceive a baby with my husband or forget about having kids. But I can’t neither first nor second! So I’m thinking about a loan. May I ask which clinic have you chosen for surrogacy? How much did you pay? Thanks for help!


It makes me happy that my story inspires people! We considered UK too, also India and Russia. In case of UK, not only price scared us away, but their law ‘The surrogate mother remains the legal mother of the child.’ By the way, Russian legislation has the same law. We were about to go to India. We contacted their clinic and arranged our meeting with their doctor. Then we saw a video on youtube about woman, who experienced surrogacy in this clinic. She told there horrible things! She told that despite of fast finding of surrogate mother, that clinic does minimum check of them and takes women with diabetes and obesity in surrogacy programs. And it was not the first time we’ve seen such review! So we canceled our meeting immediately and started to look for another European clinic. And one of them caught our eye, Ukrainian clinic BioTexCom. The reviews about it were different, but most of them were positive. And also their price is lower then in other countries. We paid €39 900 for like everything, starting from oocyte donation and finishing with all needed documents. We were met at the airport, provided with comfortable apt and food. We had a manager, who translated everything for us. They even provided us with smartphones with Ukrainian phone numbers to ease our communication. The clinic has packages for their services. You can choose the most suitable for you. You can find more details on their website or contact a program coordinator, who will answer all your questions. We contacted them a couple of times and they answered really fast. You won’t have to wait for days or weeks.
The cost of taxi, translator services and accommodation was already included into the package. So there were no extra payments at all. The whole amount of money was divided into 5 parts. It was nice because we didn't have all sum to pay right away. We had time to collect and give away each part during each of our visits. Also you can transfer money on their account if it suits you more. Of course we were also little bit afraid to pay all sum at once, especially considering the fact how much scammers and frauders out there.
There were other couples, from different countries. All of them had their own manager, who spoke their language and translated everything for them. We’ve spoken with a couple from USA. They came on a planned ultrasound. Actually it was one more reason, which convinced us to sign a contract with the clinic. There were a lot of people there. Not only couples, but also women, who came to do necessary tests for programs of surrogacy and egg donation. Ukrainian women are really very beautiful! And the clinic chooses girls for the programs very carefully. We had been waiting in queues for a couple of hours. I can’t say that it’s a drawback. Seeing all those couples only ensured us that it is not a fraud. The clinic found SM for us in 2 months. We thought it will take much longer. So when the program coordinator contacted us in 7 weeks after our first visit and told us this great news, we were shocked and pleasantly surprised! We didn't expect it will be so fast.
I’ve also heard about such cases! Thanks our clinic, the procedure was easy. We had no problems with documents and registration of our son. The clinic took over registration and certification of all needed documents. Also they helped with birth certificate and passport for the child to leave the country. Also the clinic provided all information about condition of the surrogate mother and the child. They'd been contacting us one time per month minimum.
I'm glad to help! So please ask whatever you need) I understand how it's important to talk with someone who've seen everything with their own eyes. Two years ago I was in your hide. Thanks to ladies with experience in surrogacy I made my choice) So I want to be this lady for such girls, as I was) Our SM lived with her family during the whole program. All of surrogate mothers have their own kids. It would be cruel to take them away from their beloved ones. I think it is better for them to live with their families. In such way they feel comfortable. They don't worry about their loved ones. The fewer their worries are, the better for our child)) The clinic provided us with housing during all our visits. There were no extra spendings. Speaking about war, it takes place in the east part of Ukraine. It is absolutely safe in Kiev. So you shouldn't worry about this)
Monicagr1704 wrote:
Girls, I came here to find help and support. It happened so that I can’t carry a baby. I had 3 miscarriages. I don’t think I will be able to cope with another one. It’s so hard and so unbearable! I feel miserable and I feel ashamed in front of my husband. I lost 3 children… I hate myself for this. I don’t understand why me? What have I done to suffer like this? All of my friends have families. They have kids, they have everything! And here I am, who can’t even carry my own child. Of course I’m happy for them! Sometimes they ask me to stay with their kids, when they have work or some other stuff. I like to play with them, read fairytales and buy toys for them. I feel so happy at that moment! I imagine how it would be if my children were alive, with us… Doctors said they don’t know the reason and advised us to try ART. I don’t want to waste time any more. It’s hard to live like this, tearing myself with guilt. Now I’m looking for a good clinic. But I’m so scared. I receive support from my husband. He thinks that surrogacy is a very good option for us. But both mine and his parents think that surrogacy is wrong and unnatural. I read here, how girls are grateful to their families. I have completely different situation. My parents blame me all the time. They think I do something wrong and that’s why I lost my children. My mother told me, that all women in our family have an amazing health and no one ever had problems with carrying their children. I tried to explain them that it’s not true. They never listen and we argue all the time. I don’t know what would I’ve done without my husband! He is the only one who supports me. I just really hope that everything will change! I hope we’ll find clinic or some agency and procedure will give us chance to be happy. Girls, any advice? What should we consider? Where to start our search?
Deeramires wrote:
I’ve also heard about such cases! Thanks our clinic, the procedure was easy. We had no problems with documents and registration of our son. The clinic took over registration and certification of all needed documents. Also they helped with birth certificate and passport for the child to leave the country. Also the clinic provided all information about condition of the surrogate mother and the child. They'd been contacting us one time per month minimum.


Hi. I know this topic has been inactive for a while but I was really keen to find out how long it took to arrange the passport for your to be able to bring him back to Australia?
Jo_Esterhuizen wrote:

Hi. I know this topic has been inactive for a while but I was really keen to find out how long it took to arrange the passport for your to be able to bring him back to Australia?


Hello! It took for about a month to prepare all documents. During this time we lived in apartment. It was provided by the clinic. So we didn't have extra waste of money. We had no problems or difficulties at all though I had worries about it. We received all needed help to arrange everything fast. There were no complications at customs as well.
I'm so sorry to hear about your losses, hun. I think surrogacy is a good option, considering the miscarriages. Run a thorough check first for the clinic. You might also want to look at some European clinics. They offer really great packages and the success rate is also very high. Ukraine I would suggest is the best place. Remember, in surrogacy, selecting a good clinic is the most critical task. Check every aspect beforehand. See what are the arrangements that the clinic has made, especially for the foreigners. Another important aspect is to know that country's legislative process for surrogacy. I wish you all the best with your surrogacy journey. Keep us updated on the progress. I'm sure you will make it this time around. Mother of a perfect child. That's what I see in you now smile
dear Monica! you can't possibly blame yourself for somethign that is not even in your control. It's really disappointing to see that people don't have compassion at all in this time and age. The loss of a child is known only to a mother. To lose 3 of them I can't even imagine your pain. If your doctor has suggested surrogacy I think you should consider stimulated pregnancy fuck as IFV IMF before that, who knows it might work. If not you even donate your own egg if they are fertile and there are some unknown problems. also by using fertile sperm, you can get a surrogate mother who will grow your child. A lot of people are doing this. You are creating life there is nothing wrong or immoral with that.
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