It was only for a week....

Doctor confirmed yesterday that it sounds like we had a miscarriage. It was really early on, I'd only been feeling symtoms for about a week. I have PCOS and I keep thinking it's my fault, and I keep upsetting my husband.

My best friend understands and doesn't say anything about babies, but my own mother keeps saying things about babies even though I've told her to "please don't say anything". She's had two d&c's and she's really matter of fact about the fact that SHE could have children. But she doesn't take into account that I can't look at anything to do with babies without having a massive breakdown.

I've told her to not say anything or to not show me anything to do with babies, and she shows me a video, out of the blue of a little girl at a fete she went to.

I didn't want her to sensor herself, but I've been wanting children for a long time, and I finally have the man I want them with, and we have a miscarriage, and tell people, and it seems that my own mother has done nothing but scorn me.

I've also got depression, possible borderline personality disorder and have a history of self harm. She knows this, and she knows that babies are a trigger.

I can't let go, I'm upsetting myself and my husband every time we're around women with prams or toddlers. (Unless family or friends, our Godson gives me hope.)

Have any of you experienced this while trying to get pregnant? I just want some hope, because I just can't seem to dig myself out of this mikscarriage depression.

Hang in there, kiddo - it does get better. My partner and i had tried for a couple of years, with two early miscarriages - what made me angry was the laid-back attitude of doctors who shrugged and gave me miscarriage stats - it's YOUR body, and of course you're going to be b***dy upset. Don't be too hard on yourself not wanting to be around small children - been there as well, it will pass in time; just look after yourself and your partner at the moment, do fun things together, things with no kids involved (late night movie sessions, bushwalking or whatever floats your boat).

It sounds like your Mum is just not capable of empathy at this time - try and get some support from somehwere else, be it close girlfriends or a good female GP. I don't know if you're seeing a fertility specialist, but the good ones are worth their weight in gold - there are so many threads here on the Huggies Forum with positive PCOS stories, there is a lot of hope out there.

Thanks Page83 and Spritegrrl, this was our first too, I keep seeing things that remind me, and I keep having awful dreams about losing our baby even though it was so early.

I had a longer than usual AF, and I'm expecting to have another, unless we're lucky...

When we come back from our honeymoon, I'll start tracking my ovulation, but I bought a pregnancy magazine the other day, so I feel like I'm being 'serious' about it now.

I'm having good days and bad days, but I'm trying to hang in there.

smile Thanks

Still trying, I bled unusually on our honeymoon too. sad Thank goodness hubby is so supportive, I'm just going to try not to think about it anymore, it just really hurts when I think I'm going to be okay, and I start cramping really bad and bleeding heavily again. sad

My step MIL is happy I am having miscarriages... My own mum keeps bringing up babies and MIL gives me a hug.

I'm really trying to distract myself, but every time I see a BFN and the cramps start, I keep thinking it's all my fault and get really depressed. sad