Not sure how to feel

On the 12-12-11 we lost our baby girl at 20 weeks. When we went to find out we was told it was one of those things and that it may or may not happen again.

I thought i was fine with the whole ttc after this and last week found out i was 5 weeks pregnent with our 3rd child. I am ment to be happy right? all i can think of is that we will get to 20 week and loose this one as well. I am not telling everyone until 20 weeks because i am so worried we will loose it as well.

Who has gone on after a MC and had a healthy baby?

We only was trying because it took me 5 years to get katie and a whole of a 20 weeks to loose her and so because i am not getting any younger we was trying again. I knew it could happen just it took a while to get her so it could take a while to get another but now i have them and they are due the 16th of july i am not sure i am ready to go through all the heart breack again.

Firstly i am so sorry for the loss of your little girl.

Have you got a counsellor or a social worker that you can talk to? I'm pretty sure the hospital can give you contact numbers for you to talk to someone if you need to.

Are you on facebook at all? There is a really good parent support forum on a site called Bears of Hope, they are a charity organisation that give support with pregnancy and infant loss.
The reason i am suggesting that is that i am a member of it as we lost our beautiful baby boy on the 24th Oct of this year and have found that this support group have been fantastic as the people there are feeling/have felt everything i am going through. I do know there are quite a few ladies on there that have had what they call their 'rainbow' babies so they would be able to tell you what their feelings and thoughts were as i'm pretty sure that being anxious and scared would be pretty normal.

Good luck and i hope you have have a beautiful healthy baby in your arms at the end of 9 months. If you want any more info on bears of hope or anything, feel free to message me xoxo

I'm sorry for your loss.

In July this year I had my rainbow baby. I lost my little girl in jan 2011 at 20weeks and went on to have two more early miscarriages before I got one to stick in October last year.

I spent most of my last pregnancy more scared than excited. I never felt relaxed for the whole pregnancy. I spent a lot of time getting the reassurance I needed from the midwives with extra visits and checks, and my obs was great too. I'm sure they thought I was crackers. But i didn't care what they thought, I just did what I needed to do to feel comfortable.

I also had some counseling with an organization called pregnancy loss Australia (formally tlc), and that was useful too.

What you are feeling is really normal, it brings back a lot of old stuff, but I found having another baby very healing, as well as having a brand new baby of course!