Ectopic Pregnancy - lost fallopian tube, baby and had blood transfusion

I am hoping some of youf can answer my questions. Last week I had an ectopic pregnancy where I was rushed to hospital, my left fallopian tube had ruptured. I lost my tube, my baby and a lot of blood requiring a blood transfusion. I was petrified and in a lot of pain (I still am). I really want another baby (this will be my 3rd child and my first 2 pregnancies were text book and so easy). I am wondering if any mums have had an ectopic, how they coped and if they tried again for another baby?? Also I had to have a caesarean type operation. Does this mean my next baby has to be via caesarean. I feel so cheated - I know I am lucky already to be a mum and lucky to be alive after my ordeal but it's so unfair to be ripped open and not get a baby in the end. I have been told not to do much for 6 weeks which is a long time when you have 2 kids and no family for support. Thanks for your advice

Firstly I just wanted to say sorry for your loss GBHs

I too have been through this horrible experience.....two times sad My first was after having a trouble free pregnancy with DD1. I only needed keyhole surgery and our little one became an angel at 7weeks. My second was after DD2 and this was more complicated as they tried to save my remaining tube with methotrexate but it didn't work I also had a cyst on my ovary that burst and I was bleeding internally so ended up with a c-section cut so they could fix my ovary and then took my last remaining tube as it was too damaged sad

In answer to you questions. We conceived DD2 quickly after the first. But because that was keyhole surgery my body didn't need much time to recover. In fact I felt myself pretty much after a week. DD2 was born 39weeks 4days and I had a trouble free pregnancy. With the second, the c-section cut and loss of blood (they didn't give me a blood transfusion but I lost almost a litre!) it took a long time to recover. I think I returned to work after 3 weeks, but was told to take at least 4 weeks off. I was also told not to lift my 8 months old, but that was totally unrealistic.

This type of surgery goes mean you need to let yourself recover. Probably wait at least 6 months before trying again. I don't see why you can't delivery naturally again. When they cut into you, it was just into your stomach wall and not into your uterus. But you do need to remember, despite you have two normal pregnancies, now that you have had an ectopic you could have another one. I hope you were told of this. They say some people just get them, a very small percentage (lucky us huh) and they don't know why. So if you decide to try again, make sure you get a scan asap once your pregnancy is confirmed.

Oh and I have made a facebook group to support those of us that have had ectopics. You are welcome to join us. Its called "life after an ectopic pregnancy". Just search for it and ask to join. Its a closed group so no one other than members can see what is written in the group.

Once again GBHs

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Hi I am just bumping this.....can anyone please give me advice??

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So sorry for your loss!! I'm assuming that perhaps not many people have experienced this? Maybe it would be good to join the facebook group the PP has suggested as you may find more advice there?

Good luck.

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Hi there - so sorry for your loss. I have been through something similar. I had stomach aches and cramps for a week. (I was also in an abusive relationship) I put it down to stress as I had been planning my escape after a decade of his madness. By the 6th day I was in agony. He wouldn't take me to the hospital until I begged him to and threatened to call an ambo myself. He dropped me off at emergency. I had no idea that I was pregnant. I leaned against a pole in the emergency ward for an hour or so then passed out and collapsed. I had bled out nearly 7 litres internally. I woke up the next day in the renal unit. At mid morning a doctor came and told me what had happened - I lost a baby, my left fallopian tube, my left ovary and a large piece of my cervix, and the end of my right tube was 'badly damaged'. I'd had a salpengectomy. (Don't know how to spell it. sounds like that tho - it's like half a hysterectomy) He then told me I'd never have children. I was heartbroken. To make matters worse - the idiot I called my boyfriend at the time wasn't even there when I woke up. He dropped me off at emergency and went home. Waited for me to call him. My parents had been called (due to the bleeding etc the docs wanted them to 'come say goodbye'). My whole family drove over 300kms to come see me. They were all there when I woke up. He wasn't. I told my dad the last decade with him was over. I wasn't going to tolerate the abuse anymore and this was my big signal to get out before it's too late.

I didn't fall into depression - I just kinda 'left my body' for a few weeks. Everything was on autopilot. I just didn't/couldn't think. With moving into my own place for the first time and trying to work and save for household items etc I didn't let myself grieve. 3 months after all of this happened I started 'seeing' one of my former friends. Everything was going great until one morning I couldn't stop throwing up. He went to work - I went to the pharmacy. got the test home and did it - I was pregnant! Not planned, all natural, totally unexpected and after just coming to terms with being told I would be childless unless I adopt. 9 months later - quick as a flash, non-complicated delivery - I was holding a beautiful baby girl. I called her Grace - she is my blessing.

The universe works in strange ways - I don't believe in a god per say; but I do strongly believe that everything does happen for a specific reason. My first baby came but left me too soon, before she was even born. But she taught me just how precious life is and that every second of it should be cherished. I wasn't cherishing life - my lil angel showed me this and gave me the strength to leave. She lead me to my new life with a great man and now we have a gorgeous girl whose about to turn 2. Miracles can and do happen - don't give up

*GBH* and sorry for the novel. But I just wanted to share with you 'cos it seems u'r a bit lost and alone in this at the moment sad

Thank you lovely ladies for your replies. I think I am finding it hard because no-one in my life understands.

Plumbum - I can't find that facebook page - I have searched and searched....any other ideas?? I would really like to join the page. It is good to know that I am not alone in this.

Mylilbear - I am so glad you got your Grace....what a fitting name for her. I am also happy that you have found a great man.....life does throw some curve balls but you're right everything does happen for a reason.

Thank you again for your replies xx

Thank you lovely ladies for your replies. I think I am finding it hard because no-one in my life understands.

Plumbum - I can't find that facebook page - I have searched and searched....any other ideas?? I would really like to join the page. It is good to know that I am not alone in this.

Mylilbear - I am so glad you got your Grace....what a fitting name for her. I am also happy that you have found a great man.....life does throw some curve balls but you're right everything does happen for a reason.

Thank you again for your replies xx

Not sure why you can't find it.....hmmm weird. Perhaps PM me your name and details and I can look you up on FB