I am so sorry for your loss.
First of all you are not loosing the plot! You need to deal with your loss in whichever way is best for you and no-one can tell you how you should/shouldn't be feeling and reacting, including yourself.
This is a very difficult time for you, I know. I too lost my baby and had a D&C last week. I would have been 20 week pregnant now. At my ultrasound last week, I was told that my baby had stopped growing and had passed away. I don't know when, I don't know why and I don't know how.
I understand your pain. Having this happen and your feelings of anger, furstration and confusion as to why this happened, how this happend and why it happened to you.
One thing that is helping me deal with my loss is trying to put it into a positive light. Our 'peanut', just like your little one was just too good for the world and was destined for much bugger and better things. I also believe that although we don't know the cause of our baby's passing, I did everything I could to give it a comfortable and cozy life inside my whomb. It was loved from day 1 and will be loved forever. If in the comfort cozy confines of my whomb, our little baby could not survive, then this nasty, cruel world is no place for my little angel and I am greatful that it hasn't had to suffer in it.
I am looking forward to the future with excitement and anticipation. I am up for the challenge of doing it again and having my baby. It will be hard when it does happen, to relax and feel at ease with a future pregnancy, but I know with the support of my husband, we will get there.
I am also planning on seeing a councellor, just to make sure that I have worked through my grief and that we are emotionally ready to try again, when we have decided the time is right. Maybe this is something worth considering. Your GP, or OB should be able to put you onto someone that can help in this situation.
I wish you all the very best and pass on my deepest sympathies for your loss and I am happy to talk more if you want/need to.