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BREAST FEEDING DRAMAS, HELPPPPPPPPPPP Rss

HI LADIES, HOPE ALL IS WELL.

I'M BREAST FEEDING MY 6 DAY OLD DAUGHTER AND IT'S BEEN DIFFICULT, NOT LATCHING ON PROPERLY, POSITIONING ETC, I CAN SIT AND B/F FOR AN HOUR AND SHE STILL ISN'T SATISFIED, CRYING ETC WEVE HAD THESE CRYING EPISODES AND HER NOT SLEEPING PROPERLY BEING VERY UNSETTLED FOR 3DAYS NOW. I HAD A LACTATION CONSULTANT COME YESTERDAY, WHICH WAS GREAT SHE SHOWED ME TECHNIQUES IN LATCHING ETC. THEN I NEED TO TOP UP 30-50ML OF B/M WHICH MEANS I ALSO HAVE TO EXPRESS. SHE'S JUST A LAZY FEEDER AND FALLS ASLEEP ON BREAST, AND NOT AND EFFECTIVE SUCKER, EVEN IF I STRIP HER DOWN AS I'VE BEEN ASKED TO DO. AT NIGHT SHE WAKES 1-2 TIMES FOR A FEED BUT DOESN'T FEED SHE SLEEPS, MY CHN SAID IF SHE SLEEPS AND IS NOT INTERESTED IN A FEED PUT HER BACK TO BED AS LONG AS NEXT FEED IS NOT OVER 6 HOURS, BUT THAT WOULD BE IMPOSSIBLE, AS IT WOULD MOST DEFINATELY END UP BEING MORE THAN 6 HOURS. I'M AT MY WIT'S END DON'T KNOW WHAT TO DO?
HAS ANYONE BEEN THROUGH THIS OR GOING THROUGH THIS? ANY ADVICE WOULD BE GREAT.

BUT THATS NOT THE END OF IT I ALSO HAVE A 16MTH OLD DAUGHTER THAT'S NEEDS LOOKING AFTER AND I'M STRESSIN OUT BIG TIME, DONT KNOW HOW TO JUGGLE THE 2, CAN ANYONE GIVE ME SOME ENCOURAGING ADVICE, I FEEL LIKE IM GOING CRAZY, CRYING ALL THE TIME.

WITH MY FIRST I B/F AND EXPRESSED AND MIXED FORMULA FOR 8MTHS, TILL I FOUND OUT I WAS PREGNANT AGAIN, EVENTOUGH IT WAS TIME CONSUMING, HAVING JUST THE ONE MADE IT A LITTLE EASIER, EVERYONE TOLD ME INC CHN JUST GO ON STRAIGHT FORMULA, BECAUSE I WAS DOUBLING UP IN TERMS OF B/F 1HR THEN MAKING FORMULA AND EXPRESSING, BUT I WAS DETERMINED TO B/F AS ITS ALMOST DRUMMED INTO YOU COZ B/M IS BEST!!

BUT NOW THAT I HAVE A ANOTHER LITTLE ONE I DONT KNOW IF I COULD DO THIS ANYMORE OR FOR HOW LONG THIS B/F ETC AS I HAVE MY OTHER DAUGHTER TO CONTEND WITH AND NOT WANTING ATTENTION TAKEN AWAY FROM HER....I FEEL SO GUILTY, I'M HOPING I COULD AT LEAST DO 8 MTHS LIKE MY FIRST, BUT DONT KNOW IF I'LL LAST THE DISTANCE, 8 MTHS COULDN'T COME QUICK ENOUGH, JUST WANT THESE FIRST FEW MTHS OVER WITH QUICKLY THAT I FEEL REALLY BAD AND GUILTY.HELPPPPPPPPPPP PLSSSSSSSSSSSS.

SORRY FOR LONG POST BUT I'M AT MY WITS END ALREADY AFTER 6 DAYS.


THANKS
[Edited on 18/01/2008]
[Edited on 18/01/2008]
[Edited on 18/01/2008]

MIABELLA

Ok, first off congratulations of the birth of DD2. Secondly take a deep breath and third well done for getting this far with all the challenges. I'll take it one step at a time.


Posted by: BELLA1109
HI LADIES, HOPE ALL IS WELL.

I'M BREAST FEEDING MY 6 DAY OLD DAUGHTER AND IT'S BEEN DIFFICULT, NOT LATCHING ON PROPERLY, POSITIONING ETC, I CAN SIT AND B/F FOR AN HOUR AND SHE STILL ISN'T SATISFIED, CRYING ETC WEVE HAD THESE CRYING EPISODES AND HER NOT SLEEPING PROPERLY BEING VERY UNSETTLED FOR 3DAYS NOW. I HAD A LACTATION CONSULTANT COME YESTERDAY, WHICH WAS GREAT SHE SHOWED ME TECHNIQUES IN LATCHING ETC. THEN I NEED TO TOP UP 30-50ML OF B/M WHICH MEANS I ALSO HAVE TO EXPRESS. SHE'S JUST A LAZY FEEDER AND FALLS ASLEEP ON BREAST, AND NOT AND EFFECTIVE SUCKER, EVEN IF I STRIP HER DOWN AS I'VE BEEN ASKED TO DO. AT NIGHT SHE WAKES 1-2 TIMES FOR A FEED BUT DOESN'T FEED SHE SLEEPS, MY CHN SAID IF SHE SLEEPS AND IS NOT INTERESTED IN A FEED PUT HER BACK TO BED AS LONG AS NEXT FEED IS NOT OVER 6 HOURS, BUT THAT WOULD BE IMPOSSIBLE, AS IT WOULD MOST DEFINATELY END UP BEING MORE THAN 6 HOURS. I'M AT MY WIT'S END DON'T KNOW WHAT TO DO? HAS ANYONE BEEN THROUGH THIS OR GOING THROUGH THIS? ANY ADVICE WOULD BE GREAT.


DS1 was a lazy feeder and sometimes nothing I did would get him to feed. He did get better eventually but it did take time. Not much help I know, and not sure you need to express, all that will do is boost your milk supply even more and that is possibly something you don't want. Though if she is going more than 4 hours between feeds you may need to express to keep your supply up. I know you are not supposed to, but have you introdiced a dummy? This can sometimes teach them how to suck if that is an issue.

As for the crying episodes and being unsettled, that is normal. Tiny babies can get overstimulated really easily and this tends to make them crabby. I know this is probably going to be hard but try and latch dd on as much as you can. Lots of skin to skin and if you have a sling, carrying her around in it might help get her feeding. DS1 is 4 and he's been really understanding (most of the time) about me needing to feed Alex, but that might be harder with a 16 month old. He's also really good about me expressing and usually watches and checks to see how much milk I'm getting. LOL

BUT THATS NOT THE END OF IT I ALSO HAVE A 16MTH OLD DAUGHTER THAT'S NEEDS LOOKING AFTER AND I'M STRESSIN OUT BIG TIME, DONT KNOW HOW TO JUGGLE THE 2, CAN ANYONE GIVE ME SOME ENCOURAGING ADVICE, I FEEL LIKE IM GOING CRAZY, CRYING ALL THE TIME.


It can be hard juggling two children, but it can be done. When you are feeding try reading to DD1 or having her sit quietly next to you playing. Does she have dolls, maybe she can feed her baby too during these times? It's still early days so when DD2 is sleeping try and spend a bit of one on one time with DD1 and if they are both asleep at the same time go to bed yourself. It is hard work being a mum of two, though I don't have any experience of parenting two so close together in age. DS1 is so independant that he's always trying to be helpful. Try and get DD1 to help with dd2, get her to fetch nappies or wipes for baby; though don't do this too much as she might start to resent dd2.

WITH MY FIRST I B/F AND EXPRESSED AND MIXED FORMULA FOR 8MTHS, TILL I FOUND OUT I WAS PREGNANT AGAIN, EVENTOUGH IT WAS TIME CONSUMING, HAVING JUST THE ONE MADE IT A LITTLE EASIER, EVERYONE TOLD ME INC CHN JUST GO ON STRAIGHT FORMULA, BECAUSE I WAS DOUBLING UP IN TERMS OF B/F 1HR THEN MAKING FORMULA AND EXPRESSING, BUT I WAS DETERMINED TO B/F AS ITS ALMOST DRUMMED INTO YOU COZ B/M IS BEST!!


At the end of the day, a happy mum = happy bub. I was given this advice as well with DS1 because he wasn't putting on weight fast enough (though he was really happy in himself) so he had his first bit of formula at about 6 weeks old. I continued bf him, and he had 1 bottle of formula a day, though this increased to mainly formula when I went back to work when he was 6 months old as I was rubbish at expressing. He self weaned at just shy of 10 months and I was gutted because I wasn't ready yet. LOL I had worked so hard to keep him bf (wanted to give up at 4 weeks) that I felt kind of cheated....but that's another story altogether.

Though breast is best, it isn't always best for everyone. Even if a baby only has colostrum, they have had a great start. Do what is best for you and your family because at the end of the day that is all that should matter.

BUT NOW THAT I HAVE A ANOTHER LITTLE ONE I DONT KNOW IF I COULD DO THIS ANYMORE OR FOR HOW LONG THIS B/F ETC AS I HAVE MY OTHER DAUGHTER TO CONTEND WITH AND NOT WANTING ATTENTION TAKEN AWAY FROM HER....I FEEL SO GUILTY, I'M HOPING I COULD AT LEAST DO 8 MTHS LIKE MY FIRST, BUT DONT KNOW IF I'LL LAST THE DISTANCE, 8 MTHS COULDN'T COME QUICK ENOUGH, JUST WANT THESE FIRST FEW MTHS OVER WITH QUICKLY THAT I FEEL REALLY BAD AND GUILTY.HELPPPPPPPPPPP PLSSSSSSSSSSSS.


Have you considered mixed feeding again? I know all about mother guilt and it's a b***h isn't it? LOL I often felt in the early days especially that ds1 was missing out because Alex needed so much attention. Gradually over time, as Alex has gotten older and isn't feeding as often I have been able to spend more quality one on one time with James.

I was like that with DS1...he had colic and reflux and I wanted his first few weeks over with so badly, but then I felt bad when they were gone. This time around it seems like the weeks and months have flown past and I wonder where all the time has gone. It's sad because Alex may very well be my last baby (unless I can get DP to agree to another)and I know I'll never experience this time again. It does get easier, you just have to hang in there.

It sounds like the baby blues may have kicked in a bit, try and get df to help as much as he can and get as much rest as you can and if gets too much for you don't be afraid to ask for help.

I think I have rambled on long enough, just want to give you this link to a bf site that was my bible, still is and has some useful information on it. It is American but it is pretty good.

http://www.kellymom.com/bf/index.htm l

SORRY FOR LONG POST BUT I'M AT MY WITS END ALREADY AFTER 6 DAYS.


Don't apologise, we all need help every now and again. Enjoy your two daughters and remember, in the end do what is best for you and your family and don't beat yourself up about it.

Christina

[Edited on 18/01/2008]


Hi girls, you both sound like you have been or are going through the wringer!!

you may have noticed that i have posted a couple of times and am very pro Australian Breastfeeding Association. so i have put in their web details http://breastfeeding.asn.au/products/counselling.asp i tend to stay with what works.

the girld who "woman" the phones are brilliant and they have all the time in the worl to listen, no matter how big or small the problem. amazingly they also seem to have not one but a few suggestions for solutions [in my case anyway].
also it need not be a one off call, often you are able to keep in contact with the one person who helps right throughout the whole issue.
they are available 24hours a day tooo; such wonderful people.
hope this info helps

mum to ben 20/4/03, Riley 19/4/05, Megan 15/9/06 &

Hi,

Just wanted to add that there is also a forum on the ABA website, you could even cut and paste your post directly into there. Some of the counsellors even visit the forum, so you would be able to get expert advice from them.

Good luck!

Sounds similar to what I had with DS. Get her checked for tongue tie. Is feeding hurting you at the moment - even if she is latched on properly.
My DS had this tongue tie issue which is meant to be rare, but can have a huge impact on your feeding. Since he got it fixed, feeding has been great. Ask you CHN to check ASAP so that you can get it fixed.

Sounds similar to what I had with DS. Get her checked for tongue tie. Is feeding hurting you at the moment - even if she is latched on properly.
My DS had this tongue tie issue which is meant to be rare, but can have a huge impact on your feeding. Since he got it fixed, feeding has been great. Ask you CHN to check ASAP so that you can get it fixed.

Hi,

Congrats on the birth of your baby. My daughter is almost 3 weeks old and I have has issues BF. I have a huge milk supply and she still does not seem satisfied. I have been feeling guilty for the last 3 weeks as I have been expressing and feeding her in a bottle. I know realise that my sanity needs to be managed and I should not feel bad for having issues with BF. It is not as easy for some. Take it easy on yourself and be gentle to yourself and do what makes you and your baby (and family) happy. Don't let other people's views make you feel guilty.
hi there

the other ladies have given you great advice so all i wanted to say is that my baby is 6 weeks old tomorrow and it has taken me up until now to establish breast feeding properly.

my DD is still a lazy/sleepy feeder and it is still not "easy" for me to feed her.

It can be a struggle for many mums and bubs so try to be patient and remember that your not the only one that has struggled and there are plenty of people on here who can sympathise and if you ever need to chat or have questions, feel free to PM me
Hi there

Just to let you know you are not the only one - I took until 8 weeks to get my son established feeding - and that was an utter nightmare - my mother - who lives over 800kms away from me came to visit and suggested that I try a different position for him - I ended up "football" holding him and am currently doing the same for my daughter. I know that a lot of places arent set up to feed that way easily, but it is worth persisting if you find a way that works for you - I have an oversized nappy bag I use as a support and have often had to resort to sitting on the floor - thank heaven for disposable change matts!.

I am sorry to say I am one of those people who had nothing but bad experiences with with the Nursing Mothers Association - but everyone is different. So if they are helpful for you call them, if the advice they give isn't any good ignore them - your local hospital should be able to give you the name of a good lactation consultant if you need it.

Hang in there, I know how difficult it is with two and congratulations on being able to ask for help even when you are so distressed - it's not easy, but you should do fine.
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