Things were great at first, he loved spending time with josh and i, and vice versa. We moved in together in March, so i was around 6 months pregnant. things went downhill from there.. HE kept going out with his friends all the time, attending stupid car meets from a car club hes in *and hes got the nice fancy v8 to go with it, that chews more petrol then we can afford* and i was basically alone most of the pregnancy. Little Charlie was born 4 weeks ago and things have been ok, hes great with his son, but is now ignoring josh, and pushing josh away wenever he goes near charlie and his family do the same. they come here every weekend to see Charlie, and poor josh gets beside himself, and overly naughty, as hes noticing how much ppl arent talking ot him anymore, and how hes been pushed away. its makin things very awkward here, and id ont want to have to go out every time his family come down to see charlie., i dont want the kids seperated.
My partner is a mummys boy, mummys payed all the bills hes ever had for him, done everything for him, so now hes not got much money, shes trying to control things here, and telling me had i done HER budget when we moved in, hed have money for his rediculously priced insurance/rego,and that hes got to take my car to work 40 mins away, to save money. yet i bare teh costs of the v8 daily.. shes just very controlling, doesnt ring up to speak to me anymore, doesnt ask how josh is.i cant talk to my partner about any of this, as i have tried to before, and he tells me to stop etitng so hurt by it and she dosent mean it like this,etc etc, which is bullshit, coz other ppl have comented on the whole situation with josh too..
Now things brings me to another matter.. our relationship, were not close, we dont go out and do anything together, as hes not interested in family things, dinners, parks etc, his weekends consist of a party if someones bdays on, or just sitting here at home on the net, i wouldnt ever take the kids to a party ,especially not at night, and not with idiots drinking and smoking n swearing, ive got a newborn that needs to be at home, and a 3 yr old who will pick up on all the crap they talk about, so he goes to these parties and leaves us at home, weve had a few arguments about him wanting to take charlie on his own, and ive said no.
One more thing upsetting me is this car club.. theres people in it who dont like me,long story. and theyve all sooked to hm about me, yet hes still friends with them, one friend in particular is known for being a flirty tart.. and shes CONSTANTLY smsing and msning him, and he doenst se how she is, hes oblivious to her. but hes been sooking to her about me, and hes so influenced by his mates hell do anything they advise.
I want to be engaged , more then anything, i want that for closure on being a single mum,to feel like a family with josh, not that seperation that josh is mine and charlie is his. ANd hes told me many times to not expect a ring, and i saw in his messages he was speaking to one of these girls who has been married before nd has one child, and is now seperated with another child on the way, and shes told him not to rush into things, and hes liek oh dont worry im not.
just makes me feel like shit.. hes nointentions to get a better job and provide for us. to do family things. its all gotten too much.. and i dont know what to do, i dont know how to approach it as im scred hell go back home to mummys and take Charlie with him..things will get really nasty. i dont know how ill cope if he taes charlie.. of course ill let him see him, but hes far too young to go overnight, i remember with the court process with josh they wouldnt allow him overnight till well and truly over 2, anyone else in this ame situaton? or have any advice for me??