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  5. i knew i was setting myself up to be hurt

i knew i was setting myself up to be hurt Lock Rss

I agree with everything that previous posters have said. You sound as if you put yourself down a bit ( I do it too so definitely not juging) and for no good reason. There are so many good things about you, and any man would be lucky to have you!!

Just remember... You are FAR too good to play second fiddle to ANYONE!!!!

Mummy to one big little man!!

thank you everyone so much you have made me feel alot better i have to be off now though cos ds is awake and i have to drop him at daycare in an hour then im going to go to the gym and for a swim and try to forget about dickhead! was good to get it out ill no doubt be crying into my pillow again tonight but as someone else said its better out then in!! thankyou all!
((hugs))

Lucy
You know what? I understand! I had a boyfriend years ago who was soooo nasty! He'd break up with me, sleep with someone I knew (and hated) and then get back with me and tell me he did it! With a smile on his face! The only time we weren't fighting was in the bedroom-we were perfect in the bedroom. Now, I knew it was a horrible cycle that started nice enough with dinner, a walk along the beach and then lovin when we got home but after a few weeks/months we were back to fighting, breaking up, him taking other girls home and then telling me about it while trying to get back with me. I put up with this for 3 years!

It's really hard to resist men that are so smooth even though you know deep down they are just bad for your self esteem and confidence. You just have to try really hard to occupy your thoughts and time with other things. Hanging out with girlfriends more. Maybe giving men a miss for the time being. I know that's easier said than done cause we do like them around sometimes sad(] but they seem to be letting you down. If you spend some time on YOU maybe that will reflect on others and you might even attract a decent man who will treat you with respect! This guy sounds like my ex-bf. A loser.

This thread was moved from another forum.
I think every women has been in this situation b4.
I was before i meet my df, it went on for soooo long though but i just couldnt stay away i needed someone to slap me in the face and tell me enoughs enough but no one ever did.
so heres to you *slap* you can do much better, he might be the best bf in the world but thats only if hes willing to be but hes not so just try not to get into the situation that would lead to you sleeping with him.
It sounds as thought you aren't going to get away from him as hes your best mates flat mate, so maybe just focus all the energy into you and your son, go out and have fun and have a bit of me time.

Hope everyones advise has helped.
You can pm me if you need to talk more.

oh sweety, Im so sorry you feel this way, I think when we have very strong feelings for someone NOTHING can change that even in your case of knowing he was with someone else. You dont deserve it at all. please remember that!
i KNOW that i need to stay away from him but i just feel like i cant. hes not really good looking doesnt even have a nice body or anything like that but hes real funny and confident. i wasnt attracted to him at all to start with the first time i saw him i didnt think anything of him and my friend told me he thought i was cute i just said "ew i would NEVER go there" lol and now look at me. i started to feel attracted to him when my friend told me he actually gets with some real hot chicks so i thought hmm maybe he is ok lol how pathetic is that. and he has gorgeous green eyes hehe. the first night we slept together we lay out on this huge field and just looked up at the stars and he was telling me what they all were it was so beautiful its hard to believe this same guy is such a player and such an asshole. i feel like im talking to myself so im guna shut up now lol, thanks everyone for your kind words
hey
aww SOME men can be such nasty pieces of work aye. i say some because i try and keep faith that perhaps there is a decent man out there that i will one day come across....probably won't hold my breath tho lol.

i just recently went through a very similar situation. this guy i new for a few years and was considered a really great mate moved in with me last year...we had casual thing goen on so it soon developed again once he moved in....he was fantastic with my son and my son adored him...long story short.all was really great, we wern't in a relationship but it was believed we had a mutual agreement we wern't sleeping with anyone else and he told me how much he loved spending time with me and my son blah blah blha...long story short..i knocked off work one day early at lunch time and came home to find him in our spa with another chik doen you know what ! i was in such shok i was actually shaking and didn't know what to do. that hurt like hell.
he then proceeded to move out and take back the motorbike he brought my son for x-mas...wich is a whole other story because that has affected my lil boys sleeping pattern at night because when he woke up the bike was gone..so now he says " mummy be here when i wake up,dont' go"...so he hasn't gone to sleep without me since then...
my point is...yeh it hurt like hell, and yeh i had a night where i got drunk and cried my eyes out til 3 in the morning..but then i decided i was not going to waste my tears on someone that wouldn't cry over me or care about me the way he said he did.at the end of the day he is NOT worth it.and either is the guy you are seeing !
you do deserve better than that and so does your son. your son may not see you upset but im sure he picks up on your emotions....you don't need that guy ! he is just a player..and you don't want that in your life...what your looking for is not in that guy.
get your tears out and then put it behind you and think of the awful way he has hurt you when you get upset..you'll see he's not worth it.
all the best
hope its getting easier !!
danni
xx

Danni, WA,

hey danni

thanks for your reply. im sorry about what happend to you and it does hurt like hell! your poor son aswell that was horrible of that guy to take the motorbike away from your son when he gave it to him!!I just dont know how to get this guy out of my head because i am so addicted to him it feels like a drug when we're together im so happy and afterwards im happy and then i dont see him for a couple of days and I'm just thinking about th next time i can be with him. im sure i will wake up and realise that he is not worth it one day...just not today. why are men such pigs i know there are good ones out there somewhere but like you i dont hold my breath that i will ever find one...
hey
yeh it did hurt but honestly im glad i found out now then another couple of years down the track !! yeh i can't believe he took the bike bak either...my son sat on that 24/7 when he got it, he even watched tv while sitting on it lol
you gota get this guy out of your head ! stop seeing him. pull yourself away from him. start spending time with ya girlfriends and do special outings with our lil one instead of seeing him. get your friend to come to yours instead of going there cuz thats setting yourself up if you go there.
you know you will get over it. it just takes time and space and you need to give yourself that.
keep strong !
danni

Danni, WA,

lol sorry meant to say *your little one.....hrmm someone is sleep deprived !! smile

Danni, WA,

aww thats really cruel that he took it off him then your poor little man! my friend has moved out now because she broke up with her bf who is the one who rents the house anyway. But I still find it hard to get away from him cause we go to the gym together. I can honestly say i have hardly thought about him all weekend which is really good i just havnt had the time! i know that hes with his ex for the whole weekend but i just dont care. I dont feel like its his fault at all because i knew the situation and its not like he knew how i felt about him. I'm not going to let myself get down about it anymore, because hes not worth it, but i cant say honestly that i will stop seeing him...I'm trying to focus my energy on finding a house and being with my son. thanks for your support and i hope things are working out for you now that you have that guy out of you life smile
Lucy
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